Solus Sto

I am blogging from the Phoenix Airport (which I know has some fancy moniker likely involving the words ‘harbor’ and ‘sky’, but I am not going to get into all that) waiting for my connecting flight to San Francisco to load. You see, we landed here at 7PM or so, coming from Albuquerque. It is now 9:13. My flight was supposed to leave at 7:30. I am getting royally screwed here.

First we had a gate change here in PHX. Fine, I can walk back along the same wing of a building another 100 or so yards. Not a problem. So then we get on the plane there (which is now late) and we sit on it for a solid half hour before the pilot begins telling us that there are some ‘glitches’ in the engine that he needs to have a technician come over to look at, so it’s back to the gate with us (we were on the runway). Wait another 15 minutes or so before he comes back on to tell us that sorry, we have a new plane for you to fly in, and it’s on the other side of the airport. So here I am at Gate B6 in the Phoenix Skyharbor, 2 hours late on my flight home from Albuquerque. Blah.

I’ll focus on the positive to end this, though: 1) Better the pilot discovered this engine problem on the ground in PHX rather than in the air over California. That would have been really crap-tastic. 2) I had two small children (of crying and screaming ages, like under 3 years old) behind me, and now hopefully they will be removed elsewhere.

Bonus Rant: Hey, couples with children (like babies and the such): we (and I speak for a large number of people here) don’t like your kids nearly as much as you do. At first blush this factoid may seem fairly obvious and rather silly for me to post, but it’s a fact that carries with it something of great import: Parents, please leave your children at home if they cannot behave. I’ve just spent the past few days with my 2 year old niece and her 1 month old brother, and can happily report that their parents are doing what I judge to be a pretty good job of raising the kids (i.e., the kids are quiet most of the time, and don’t create huge scenes). However, even their kids get rambunctious from time to time, and this really makes me cringe when I think of the abuses that other people’s kids can wreak.

Basic questions about places I have seen babies lately:

• Airplanes: Why on Earth would you bring a baby on a plane unless absolutely necessary? The baby isn’t gonna like it, you’re not gonna like it, and your fellow passengers will most certainly not be appreciative. Chances are, that trip could have been avoided or you could have kept the kid at home or with relatives.
• Bars: Same question as above. I know that you, as an alcoholic parent, need your drink. I can respect that, if you’ll allow me. But let’s compromise and just have you do your drinking at home, or find a sister to ditch the kid with for the night. Don’t make me have to suck back Tecate while your brat spills his Shirley Temple all over me.
• Restaurants: Look, I understand that you want to get out of the house. We all do. That’s why we’re eating at Chez Snooty and not grilling on the back porch. I’d like to enjoy my meal and the foreign ambiance, if you don’t mind, if only for the fact that I am paying too much for the meal already and want to “soak it up”. Ya dig? Your kids screaming and worse, running around the restaurant, don’t allow for this. Not cool.
• Museums: I am all for exposing children to the arts. I think it’s great and it can open their minds. However, and I know I am old school about this: don’t bring your children out in public if they can’t behave. If your child insists on crying or screaming every 15 minutes, please leave them at home. They’re not gonna get much out of it other than some play time which they could get elsewhere and in the mean while you are detracting from the rest of the publics’ visit.